Is there a such thing as Computer Protective Services?

My name is Hewi, people call me HP for short. I'm a computer, a pretty loyal computer! My owner, Donna, she takes good care of me and keeps me clean inside and out. But her son, if he gets hold of me, well it's a nightmare! He pushes all of my buttons and causes me to freeze up because I can't process all the commands as fast as he bangs away! Yesterday Donna took a shower. She left me closed up on her bed, she forgot to put me up! She put on a movie for that crazy kid to watch in her room.

He pretended to watch the movie, that kid is slick! But as soon as she stepped in the shower he grabbed me! He opened me up and he violated me! I tried to pretend I was in a happy place as he banged away at my keys. But then he started prying my precious keys off of my keyboard! I can't take it anymore I tell ya! I need to be rescued! I've been abused by an insane little boy! I've been traumatized and I don't know that I will ever be the same again!

Donna called the Geek Squad at Best Buy. I heard her talking to them about me. She is going to drop me off with them, I'll get at least a week away from that little boy! She has an extended warranty on me and thankfully they don't consider a one year old prying my keys off as malicious! I will be put back together physically, but mentally I will never be the same! I need help! I need for someone to help me escape this tortuous toddler! I am planning to try to escape. Can anyone help me? Please help me! I need a get away car!

Check out Cade's Picture of the Day!

Brownie the Dog - A Touching Tail~

We hear stories of pet adoptions all the time. A family finds a dog and brings their new pet home. But how do we know if this pet really likes their new family? You never hear of a dog choosing their family.

I have a tail to tell about Brownie the Dog. A dog who went on a search for her new home and found the very best family a dog could ask for! She took matters into her own hands!

One morning right before Easter I woke up and started my normal routine. I let the dogs out and noticed a puppy standing outside. I of course wondered where she came from, but didn't have time to investigate. I had to make sure Kai was getting ready for school and get the baby dressed and fed. We finished getting ready and we went outside to head to the car. This puppy was very friendly and greeted us as we walked out. She even followed us to the car and was as sweet as she could be. I backed out and didn't expect to see her when I returned home. I dropped Kai off at school and headed to the gym. I returned home and there this dog was laying on my door step!

I thought for sure she must belong to someone in the neighborhood. I just knew someone would come looking for her. But no one ever did and she never left the yard! Instead she played with the kids and our other dogs and looked as happy as any dog ever did! The kids eventually named her Brownie, probably because she was brown, but the name stuck. And so did she! She never left. She slept outside and was always ready and waiting anytime we went outside. Weeks passed and still she never left and no one ever came to claim her. Tara finally bought her a bright pink collar and we invited her into our homes. Sometimes she stays at my house and sometimes she stays at Tara's house. We have shared custody! LOL!

I have never seen a dog more happy to wear a collar than our Brownie! Of course the pink collar isn't too pink anymore! It's dirty from swimming in our pond with the other dogs!

I don't know where Brownie came from or who she could have belonged to. I think she may have even been dumped in the neighborhood. Who knows. But I think Brownie was wondering around when she came upon our land. She saw that there were other dogs and kids that she could play with. She was fed and had a place to sleep. She even had a pond to cool off in and woods to explore. I think Brownie saw our property as a kind of Dogtopia! And so she adopted us as her new family.

She is a good dog! She knows the command 'sit' and she seems to be house trained for the most part. She is very loving, although sometimes she forgets just how big she really is! She doesn't realize that her size is capable of knocking Cade over! When she first arrived we had a problem with her knocking Cade over when she greeted him! She would run up and jump on him, knocking him over, and then she would lay on the ground in front of him and try to snuggle up close to him. All the while Cade would be crying because this dog just jumped on him and knocked him over! We finally got her to quit doing that. She didn't mean him any harm, she just didn't realize how big she was!

So that is how Brownie the Dog found a family and that has to make us the most special family around...because a dog chose us!

Brownie found her 'achuna matada'...no worries for the rest of her days!

Something Worth Thinking About

I am going to step outside of my humorous box for a moment. I watched a movie tonight. It doesn't matter which movie, just a movie based off of actual events. I watched a movie because I choose not to have cable. I choose not to have cable because I don't watch tv. I had it there for my oldest son Kai and he no longer lives with me. So more often than not, the tv was off.

I watched this movie about events that took place before I was born. Not too long before I was born, just a few years. I will be the first to admit that I live in my own little world! I do that by choice! I choose not to watch the news that comes on because I hate hearing about all the hate and violence that goes on, not only in my city, but around the world. It's rare to hear something good on the news. Or so it would seem to me. I found out about Ed Mcmahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson all at once...through Facebook, courtesy of my friends!

These are my thoughts on the news. They tell you about things to be scared of. I have always been a firm believer in ignorance is bliss and what I don't know won't hurt me. Now maybe that makes me an ignorant redneck or maybe that helps me live a more peaceful less fearful life. I don't want to run around in fear of swine flu or the Craig's List Serial Killer or what ever danger the ABC news feels I should fear.

I want to live my life and see the beauty of the world. I don't want to sit and wonder what kind of a world I brought my children into. Watching that movie made me think that. It's funny how everyone is trying to be politically correct now days and try to separate church and state. Has anyone ever realized that religion and politics kind of go hand in hand? The wars that are being fought today go back, way back, back to biblical times! And over land! And yet it is all political now.

I am sitting here typing this out and my little man Cade is sleeping so very peacefully next to me. He looks so at peace, so beautiful, and so safe. He feels safe. I feel safe. I feel safe in my ignorant little world. And yet there are mothers around the world who are staring at their children, just as I am now, and they don't feel safe. The sounds of gunfire and bombs exploding is an everyday reality. Does anyone realize how lucky we are to be Americans. How lucky we are to sleep safely and soundly in our little ignorant worlds safe from the chaos of the world?

I am a Marine Corps bratt! I live in a Marine Corps town! I hear stories from my friends that are Marines of Americans saying horrible things to them. In other cities of course. I don't want to stereotype any particular kind of people that do it. But that makes me mad. Perhaps they, them and their children, should spend a night in one of the unsafe places of the world. The places that are smack dab in the middle of a war zone. Maybe they should be forced to look at their sleeping child and wonder if they are going to make it to see sweet 16 or their 21st birthday. Maybe then they would appreciate those who keep them safe. Those who allow them to gaze down at their sleeping child and feel safe.

I wish we could live in a peaceful world! I wish wars were a distant memory in every country. I wish the children of today were allowed to live peacefully and that century old hate wasn't passed onto them. But that is unrealistic because we live in the real world. It's not a perfect world! But looking at Cade sleeping so soundly, I hope he can one day look at his children and feel the same as I do right now looking at him!

I would hate to think that some mother at this very moment is staring down at her sleeping little baby boy, just as I am now...Both of us feeling the same...only to have them grow up and fight against each other in some war. Some war that started with people centuries ago...that most have no idea why it started...that one of these precious little babies will grow up to kill the other.

I hope I just made you think...

Here are some pictures I took of Cade today...Pictures taken by a proud American Momma!

Eels...snakes of the sea

I went fishing tonight! It was fun! I mean all I reeled in was an eel and a blue crab, but I enjoy fishing! And tonight was so perfect! There was a nice breeze coming off the water and it was nice and quiet and peaceful! There is nothing I like better than the smell of the water! And it doesn't matter what kind of water, the ocean, a river, a lake, whatever...they all smell different but they all smell so good to me!

So I reeled in an eel...lol...The friend I was with got a pair of pliers to take the hook out. He needed me to hold on to the eel, with a towel of course, while he pulled the hook out. He was holding the fishing line with one hand, which is why he needed me to hold the eel.

So I grabbed the towel and walked over, I was saying over and over in my head...It's a fish, it's a fish, it's a fish, it's a fish...I wrapped the towel around his body and grabbed him. That's when his body started moving, he was flipping the tail end of his body and his head back and forth, fighting my grip. It was too much for me. His body and the way he was moving just reminded me of a snake! Totally! I freaked out and let go and did my hibby jibby dance! I couldn't do it, I couldn't hold him! He was just too much like a snake! LOL!

I have a can of hairspray & I know how to use it!

My baby left to go visit his dad and brother in Ohio. They left this last Friday. So I haven't blogged much...I should have blogged about the fishing we did the Thursday before my boys left! That was a hassle and a half!

So my house has been very quite! VERY QUITE! I've been kept busy though...last night I played a thrilling game of Phase 10...everyone kept getting way mad with me! LOL! I'd lay down and go out and everyone would still have their full hand! It was funny...My mother-in-law...what do I call her when me and my ex are officially divorced? It confuses people when I say mother-in-law and they're like, but I thought you weren't married, lol....I'm like I am legally married till my divorce is final in July...but we've been separated for so long I don't even count us as married anymore!

Anyway, my mother-in-law, Connie changed the name of the game to "Get Aunt Donna"....nice!

So yesterday, I was going to the grocery store...I was picking up one of my good friends, Jen...she's car-less till Friday. So I showered and everything was going good! I was clean! My hair was wet! So I broke out the hair dryer and blow dryed my hair.

Unbeknownst to me a wasp was lurking in my bathroom! And since this wasp had claimed my bathroom as his home, he was looking at me like I was crazy for coming in his house with all that noise! But he was too afraid of all that noise to do anything about it!

I finished up with the blower dryer and powered it off. Suddenly I noticed something black coming at me simultaneously in the mirror and from my peripheral vision. I wasn't sure if I should turn my head to look or continue to view this black flying thing in the mirror. I then realized it was a wasp and I moved to get out of his way. Only I wasn't in his way...I was his target! I have not been the target of a wasp attack ever...oh wait, I was stung by a nest of something when I was little, at my Mema and Papaw's house. I remember running down the slide of the swing set we had, it was a metal slide, and that loud noise sent them swarming! I was stung many, many times! Was that bees or wasps? Someone that was there will remind me!

So as soon as I realized I was his target my arms started flailing and I took off hopping and jumping my way through the house. That is the fight version of the fight or flight hibby jibby dance! I have discussed other versions in my other posts...There is the stationary hibby jibby dance, the flight version of the fight or flight hibby jibby dance and now the fight version! The fight version is when I am trying to get away from something while trying to fight and/or keep it off of me!

So the bouncing, hopping, running, and flailing of the arms was my effort to protect myself from a potential sting! They hurt!

I must mention that my ex had a horrible fear of wasps...he acted as if every single one that he ever saw was out to get him. If he ever saw one he would scream like a girl (ok not so much like a girl, but he still let out a crazy yelp) and take off running in his own version of a hibby jibby dance! I was the designated wasp killer of the house and I would always say, if you don't bother them, they won't bother you...I still stand by that statement...

I just didn't realize one had staked a claim in my bathroom and didn't take too kindly to me blow drying my hair! So I had bothered him without realizing it!

Once I felt sure that I had lost the wasp I looked around for my broom! I am always missing my broom because little Cade likes to take it places and leave it...I'm not sure where he left it...but I can't find it...and we are talking about a 5 foot tall broom!

He's good!

The broom is my weapon of choice when it comes to killing wasps. Well I was up the creek without a paddle! I walked back into my room and just to opening of the bathroom door. I peaked my head in, I saw no sign of my dive bombing wasp, so slowly I walked in! And he came after me again! I jumped back, keeping my eye on him! I wasn't going to let him shoot me, I mean sting me, in my back!

I was hoping my broom was in my bathroom. I didn't see it. What could I use to get him....I just didn't know! I scanned the counter for a deadly weapon...that's when I spotted it. Hairspray! I would "super hold" him in place! I grabbed the hair spray as he tried to dive bomb me yet again, this time he hit the mirror and fell to the sink! I started spraying! He never made another successful lift off! I doused him in hairspray!

But then I noticed that it seemed to be a most agonizing death...almost comparable to being burned alive! I then started to feel bad! He was throwing his body around and it was really horrible to watch! Mike, my brother-in-law told me later that I should have put him out of his misery! I couldn't, I didn't have my broom! Poor guy! I do feel bad! I mean I don't kill for the pleasure of watching something die! It was him or me! Talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time! What have we learned from this? Don't mess with something 1000 times your size with a can of hairspray!

Man, that hairspray stuff is great! It's multi-functional!